Cause all the good times, They give you cancer

Haha for the next forever Im just gonna do song lyric titles and movie references.

Today was really nice, I mean fucking freezing, but nice. Everyday I walk from my school to a deli down this long ass walk. I google mapped it lol here :]



I walk there and back everyday. I dont know the exact distance. Although its hard to tell, theres a shit ton of hills and walking up them after 2 or 3 cigarettes makes it so much harder @__@ haha but its good for me. I also got a little high. lol Art was awesome.

I ate:
coffee X2
tea x2
Hot chocolate
Turkey
Mashed Potatoes
Broccoli
Bread
Diet Pepsi X2

OH MY GOD I was so embarrassed today X.X I plugged my USB in while talking to the boy I like and it just started playing all the pics! The first one to pop up was of me and my ex-boyfriend kissing. >.< Im sure I turned bright red. I dont know why I have it either. I dont want to delete it ughhh. Anyone else Id be cool, but Marcus? ughhh X.X I would rather my thinspo folder start playing that I could just be like oh, I really liked the outfit or something, for an art project.
Ok. Deep Breath.
Gotta gather my cool back.....ok got it together. Bahahaha little freak out there ^-^
lol I sound like a tool.

Grams home. Really happy. Hes chilling with the parents right now. w/e. He gave me his bracelet from when he was a baby, in otherwords my writs fit into a baby bracelet.

Ok heres my deal. I think Im thin. I just think I could be thinner I mean, I could probably stop here and be fine, but I wouldnt be perfect, you have to push yourself. And thats what Im doing. Pushing myself.

<3 thanks for the comments all you lovelies they really make me happy :D

What? Really? Again? Seriously?

Third day in a ROW that Ive been woken up early. 10am this time. Normally I cant fall asleep again either, but if I try hard enough I can. I end up rolling around alot, there has to be at least 10min of perfect silence for it to work though. I ended up getting out of bed at 11.

I feel like shit though, like I want to puke, and my stomach is messed up, and Im really tired. I spent like 80% of the day going up and down stairs because I kept having to retrieve christmas decor from my basement. I got 1room "done" I also put up like 1/4 my tree. I love christmas, just not today. Totally not in the mood.

Dad came home today. No fights....YET. lol He is actually going into the city for work tomorrow yay!! and Grams coming home cant wait!

Annie: I fucking love MCR to the death. Ill post some pics of my room later and you can see all the posters and shit I have of them. Its hilarious, Ill also share some concert pics. I saw them in Madison Square Garden and I had seen them before that as The Black Parade. My friends use to call me Ferard cause I used to look like Gerard(when my hair was shorter) and I had all of Franks energy and hyperness lol I <3 MCR

Ariana: You were totally right about the nose thing! We had some Realtor over :/ not that exciting by my nose stopped itching XD I have a food journal that I keep alot of my thinspo in. But I keep all of it on my USB, I have a whole series of folders you have to go through. From the whole usb-->work-->math(cause its about +/-)--> thinspo-->fattys or before and after folders.

Love you all <3 Love all your blogs <3 Love all your comments <3 love all your AWESOME

GOD

People are annoying. I cant stand to look at my facebook newsfeed anymore. Its like all the people who I dislike decided to post something at the same time. Its like the peoples whos faces I cant stand to look at, whos faces just...annoy me! OR I cant stand what their saying, I just want to write "shut the fuck up, I dont want to hear about it!" Im so damn tired.

So in my Thinspo folder on my USB there is this picture.


Why you may ask? When I found this there was a comment that made me laugh so hard I cryed. Some admirable soul had written:

"whatever, that's what fat people with no will power say! think thin girls! love ya to the bones."

I have never been so proud of my fellow pro-anas as I was then.

Stuffin Muffin!!

Woke up to my Mom making stuffing into muffins. Deliciously unhealthy ;] Was also woken up way too early by a text from a friend @________@ fell back asleep though.

I went and got a mani/pedi and ooohhhh did that feel good! I love getting all that attention and also getting those great massages! Im one of those girls who always get black nail polish ;D

No anime club today D: Marcus couldnt do it, so no snugglies with him and I had even gotten my hair all nice:[ ( I talked to Marcus alot last night SQUEEE) I dont really watch that much Anime, but I do watch, "My Bride is a Mermaid", "Moribito", "Hellsing" and Pokemon. I love movies like Spirited Away, Howls Moving Castle, Ponyo, The Place Promised in Our Early Days, and Kikis Delivery Service. I never read much Manga except Inuyasha.

Today I ate(too much):
Sandwich 1/2
Coffee X2
Diet Pepsi X2
Tea
Mashed potatoes
Stuffin Muffin X1/2
Pasta, Sauce, Sausage
Cookie X1
Chocolates X3
Gravy

Ive been eating so much latley, just to appease my mom :[ I really dislike this. EWWW. Tomorrow I need to work on a powerpoint about sexual orientation discrimination in the work place. The group of people Im working on this with I never talk to, so its really awkward :/ I only need to do a few things about laws to stop it so it should be easy. MY NOSE IS BOTHERING ME SO DAMN MUCH ITS SO ITCHY!!!!! MAKE! IT! STOP!

Hahaha that was weird.(still itches though) I believe the superstition is have an itchy nose and youll kiss a fool. My nose has been itching like crazy ALL DAY so what? Im I gonna make out with a total fool? cause I have no problem with that ;D

Okay well Im gonna go catch up on all your blogs. BTW I love all of you <333

Black (out) Friday

No shopping today. I believe that waking up at 5Am to rush to a store and get beaten by other crazy people is pointless. Mostly because the deals arent that truly amazing at the places where I want to go... lol

Today was a mess. My Dad packed up and headed for Vermont for the weekend. Last night my Mom told him he was going to loose Gram like he lost his son Garrett. That...that was going a little to far :/ even if it had to be said. Grams coming home Monday, just for a week though... I dont know what to do with my family anymore. Ugh.

I spent just about all day on my couch sleeping. I had to sleep with my mom last night, cause my mom was worried I was going to run off and get eaten by wolves.(I know, I know) My Dad slept in another room last night. She woke me up at like 7AM. thats 7hrs of sleep. After a night like that?? soooo damn tired

Yesterday, I actually dont think I ate that much. (note the think part lol)
I had:
1small slice turkey
1spoonful mashed potatoes
1spoonful sweet potatoes
Gravy
corn? haha I dont really remember. It all added up to one paperplate full XD It was really nice to see Mr.Peace and his son. I met these two other boys, 14, and 17. The 17yrold was really cute ;] hes blond and green eyed, weight lifts, likes music, all around gooood. Ill probably see him again, in VT.

From the looks of my last post, I was really drunk last night :D

Today was icky. No hangover but it certainly wasnt pretty.
Mac and cheese
cookies
coffee
tea
coke
diet pepsi
mashed potatoes
meatloaf
gravy
Raspberries
jam
lettuce
cheese
bread
mayo

ughhh. SOOOO GROSSS. note that was in no particular order, its just how i remembered it haha. I hope I have anime club tomorrow. I want to see Marcus. :3 hes sooo cute! Maybe I can keep my food a little lower. HA. no Ill try.


Ive been reading all your blogs! And I love doing that <3

did I post that pic aleardy? im too lazy to go check