WOW! oh and question?

Thank you SO much for your feedback! I wasnt expecting that at all!!

Hey, quick question. How do you girls like being responded back to? Sometimes I post you name then answer on here and other times I go to your blogs and respond on your latest posts. So what do you girls like?

Lol well today Im responding back here!

Ariana: Nah, my birdie doesnt talk, he can sortof say his own name! I got that belt at PacSun YEARS ago, seriously all my friends stud-belts they get from hottopic fall apart within a month but mine has lasted and lasted!! <33 Thanks soooo much ^-^

Heather: THANKS hahaha <3 I can tell you the first day i relized my legs didnt touch was weird. Normally I rest my Ipod on my legs while on the bus, but one day it kept falling through and I was like WTF?? then I was like :O yaya!! Thanks <3333

Rachael: I hate to sweat. I hate hate hate hate it! Every once in awhile Ill forget deodorant and ohhhhh balls I freak out on those days! Haha Adorable is perfect for my baby I love that bird, hes super soft!

Thin_Envy: The woods get reallllly boring reallly fast hahaha but if youve never lived in the woods before it can be reallly cool to see all the animals like deer and squirrels and birds and rabbits and foxes! Thanks alot!!


BY THE WAY! you all made my day SO much better your comments made me light up faster then um.... somthing that.... lights up fast(?) hahaha <3 I love you all tthanks so much for the support

So This is My Life

My head hurts. My stomach hurts. And I'm tired as hell.

I didnt eat today...yet. Just a few sips of coffee and a Diet Pepsi. My stomach is all bloated and wouldnt you know it, I had gym today. 99.9% of the time, I just put on sweat pants and leave my shirt and hoodie on. I was planning on doing that today, I had on a big soft sweater and it got hot as BALLS in that gym, so I had to take it off or run the risk of sweating(ew) so I took it off. All I had underneath was a little spaghetti strap black shirt. I was so angry cause it looked like I was pregnant, Im not. hahah! ugh.

Today was an overall shitty day. Shitty weather, gloom and doom rain. Shitty classes, no I dont feel like getting up and finding some random piece of art on the wall Mr. Government teacher. And shitty feeling, like someones pounding a drum in my head.


Thats my Baby Birdy, his name is Purdy! <3


My bedroom! Kindof messy, love my posters and flags <3


Outside my window, dreary day. But you get it when I saw I live in the woods!!


And me. Bad picture cant really see the love-handles. My arms are flab-tastic.


From the side. No sucking it in I promise. But still :/

So anyone else? I love seeing other peoples bedrooms. I used to be on some other online community where these happened all the time. <3

Well THINK THIN

Laxatives and Sleeping Pills

Since I ate so much food yesterday I had decided to take a bunch of laxatives throughout the day. I think I took 5in total(oh and they didn't help and all.) I took 2 before I went to bed... Right after I took 3sleeping pills. Rotfl I relized what I had done right after I swallowed all the pills XD I was a little scared to fall asleep!! But don't worry no sleepy time mishaps happened ;)

Today wasn't as bad as yesterday but it was still rough.
Pasta+sauce (300)
One whole bag of chips (1275)
Coffee (50)
Tea(0)
Diet Pepsi (0)

And I have yet to eat dinner O.O damn this weekend was a total fuck up!! Gahhh. But then again I barley eat all week...and I do alot of walking everyday... No. I'm just making excuses for myself. I'm also pretty bloated and gross so I look like I'm back to 125lbs like I was at the biggening of the year. I can't go back to that again. Nope. Nu-uh. Never.

*************
After dinner:

We had PASTA for dinner FML! It had spinach in it....better right?? nope
Im STUFFED right now. I feel like I ate a bowling ball, my stomach looks like a beachball under my shirt gross gross gross gross gross.

And alcohol. Drinking that. Um Amaretto is the bomb. SO yummy. Plus gets me tipsy quick, even on a full stomach... but so calorie filled. I have this thing where I dont say no to alcohol, well it depends on what it is. Basically Ill drink whatever, except Wine. Gross.

Rachael: I love reading your blog <33 Im so glad I get to see into your life also it really helps!!

Thanks Muffin, but I messed up today too! lol tomorrow right??

MICH YOU MUST SEE INCEPTION. Its such an amazing movie it will BlOw YoUr MiNd!!! <33

Love all ya girls!!

Fucking Mashed Potatoes, Oh LORD

^Friend of mine on the left. She is perfectly skinny. Shes one of those girls who eats and eats and eats and eats and try as she mite she cant gain a pound. Shes got some bad hair in real life, and kindof a shitty personality...so I guess it the imperfections even out the perfections right? Plus, her the girl next to her looks sooooo big compared to her!! lol

So I binged today SOOO BADLY OMG. All I did today was EAT!! I woke up and noone was home, Ive been wanting to do this for a while but since its so bad for me I havent been. I didnt take my ADHD meds today so I was game for anything and everything. UGH I wish I had taken them X.X So anyway, I went downstairs and made myself some of those DELICIOUS mashed potatoes that you just add water to...ate it all. All 440 calories of it. Then after that I proceeded to eat chocolate wafer cookies(140). Decided that Pasta with Alfredo sauce was a great Idea(350). 2 coffees! (100) Tea(0) and then used the leftover pasta to make a sandwich with mayo, onion, lettuce and bread. I crave the WEIRDEST things. so that was at least (200) calories. And for dinner my dad made steak that I had with a salad and asparagus. Only healthy thing of the day.

OH and almost forgot Coconut Gelato. Fuck me.

On the bright side, no fighting from my parents today. :] its nice. We watched Inception(one of my favorite movies) Im waiting till like midnight to see MCR on a live web show(im so crazy) Im gonna waste time by saving thinspo to my USB.

Im really glad I have this blog and Im even more glad that people care enough to read it all (28)!! of you!! <3 It really means alot to me when you comment. It just helps to know that someones reading, and even remotely cares about what I do. <3333 I cant express how thankful I am for each and every one of you.

Thank you<3

Mindless Self Indulgence

I haven't listened to that band since John died...but I think that shut up is an apropriate song seeing as that's all I want my parents to do. It's their 21aniversary today. And who'd have guessed they are fighting. Over compleate bull shit too. God I am so tired of it. Every fucking night. Do they really think I want to listen to this? Cause I really don't. Fuck them. Fuck autocorrect on my itouch turning my fucks in ducks. Fuck everything. LOL I put my speakers on my floor blasting stupid MF at them I hope they hear it. Assholes.

I barley ate today.
Coffee
Sausage, rice, broccoli, onions
Diet Pepsi
Water

I didn't go for the long ass walk today either :( Megan had and In-school suspenton for cutting class, and Izzy had college visit. I didn't want to walk down all by myself for no reason seeing as I ran out of smokes a couple days ago. Megang got out of inschool early thou so I cut the last class of the day to go out :) made me happy. It was fucking cold out but made me happy. We didn't even walk half way to the deli so balls to that. I danced for a good 45minutes to MCR till my mom came home.

Ya know what? I spent a good lot ofthe day pissed off. I got mad cause I was all alone in class, then I got mad cause it was so god damn cold in the school, then fucking peter wouldn't STFU about Catcher in the Rye even though I said I hate the book he kept trying to explain what a master piece it is. It's all well and good that you like it. I don't. Don't try to convince me otherwise asshole. Ugh. Peter is such a wanna be emo kid. He's one of those kids who "cuts" himself then shows it off like "I'm so troubled oh noooo you toooootally saw my cuts like don't tell anyone I'm just dealing with stuff" no. You don't have problems. I have problems. I admit some people have perfectly good reason to self harm. Whatever helps ya know? But when people do it cause they think it's cool. They can go get shot in the face.

Jesus. I'm fucking angry. I'm listening to Kim by eminem. It's the single most brutle song I've ever heard. And it's just making me more and more angry. Fuck. FUCK EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING. FUCK YOU FUCK CHESS AND MARCUS AND MOM AND DAD AND HOMEWORK ANS MATH AND COLLEGE AND FOOD AND LIFE AND MAKEUP AND COMPUTERS AND PENIS AND CUPCAKES AND....and.....rolflmao penis. Hahahahahaha

I'm a wee bit better.