Holy Balls Man

Thats my friend! She didnt do it through exercise. Stress is making her throw up, and she cant keep food down and hasnt been able to do for over a Month! Shes sick...but nonetheless shes lost an amazing amount of weight. In earlier posts shes been some of my best thinspo ;] isnt that amazing?

"why arent you eating?" :] Cute little lunch aid with a little jersy accent
"Im not hungry!" :D Chubbster me
"When do you eat?" Aid
"At least once a day!" Chubbster
"suuuSPICIOUS" aid

Now I love that lunch aid, shes the sweetest woman in the world and was actually kidding with me, but it totally put me on edge. So I ate a carrot and it was nasty :[ it wasnt skinned so it had a gross taste to it. I didnt eat that much today but Im really tired. Balls man. Ive been running around all day. I walked down to the Deli at least twice today. AND IT WAS WINDY. so damn windy. So after a windy walk, I had Drama club and I ran around there some more. I spent a good hour or two catching up with my college friend and that was nice, were going Christmas shopping tomorrow :]

So I ate today:
Carrot
Grande Vanilla latte
Scalloped potatoes
Steak
Cauliflower
Water
Diet Pepsi

Chess wouldnt answer me today :[ and I cant even bear to look at my phone. Goddamn, Im fucking pathetic. I had to explain to my college friend why I broke up with him and they all still apply but like :/ I just miss him so much. Seriously. I cant even begin to state my distaste for Kelsey (the Lumpy Bad Tan line Photo Girl YOU MADE ME LOL SO HARD WITH THAT BTW) I see her. Or him. Or both. And I want to cry, and scream, and in the pit of my stomach theres just burning.

99.9% of the time Im very even tempered. I dont get mad easily, Im generally happy, and Im not that jealous of a person, but this...boy is just killing me. I want to curl up on his lap and cry and cry and cry.

Okay. hahah lets stop before I cry right?

I did just text him and ask him if he wants me to stop talking to him...I really hope with all my heart he doesnt say yes. That would break my heart...kill me.

He answered me :]